your life is still switched on

"Don't be a pussy. Commit."

when i was driving home today, there was some guy on the road with his directional on. i wasn't sure if it was left on by accident or it was because he was trying to change lanes. then i saw him start to drift from the lane we were in into the next one. you could then tell that he wasn't sure about if it was ok to do so, so he switched back into our lane. i think eventually he made it over to where he wanted to be. but out loud, all i could say was the above statement.

and then i kind of started to drift my thoughts to myself. i want to change myself. but i feel like at this point in my life it is hard. i am busy with school and work but other than that my life is pretty empty. and i don't have the time to actively try and fill it. i am really looking forward to graduating. not only to be done with school, but to have my life open up. i feel really overwhelmed with my life as is. i'm packed full of things to do but in a way so not motivated to do any of them. i want to be done so my life can feel real...because right now i feel like a fake version of myself.