put the lonesome on the shelf

[Now Strumming] Ingrid Michaelson - You & I

i kind of...

- want a macbook.
- wish i didn't say i was going to work friday night.
- want to eat the apple that is in my refridgerator.
- am smiling about something i shouldn't be.
- should start my homework that is due tomorrow
- am super happy that my manchester/kevin tickets arrived
- butcher songs by other people regularly

- should be on my way to work already, or at least be getting ready.

something that i'm giving

regardless of me totally giving up completing my assignment that had more than two weeks to do, i actually had a really good night on a bunch of different levels.

and i think i have listened to that damn ingrid michaelson song another 10 times since i last was here. minus the lyrics, i think it is the whole singing in the round thing at the end & harmonies between ingrid, allie & bess that makes me die a little inside (and i mean death in the best possible way)

they make me want to take vocal lessons.

the wind talks back

today went really fast. i was helping out and teaching all day in a 2nd grade classroom. i think it is my last day in that room. i did enjoy them, but i am happy to be able to get back to my kids and my room. it is so different. i think i definitely transforming into a 3-5th grade teacher. i don't think that i can handle the younger ones. but then again, i'll take whatever job someone offers me once i am done getting my degree.

a new Now Playing song:
My room seems wrong.
The bed wont fit.
I can not seem to operate
and you my love are gone.

So glide away on soapy heels and
promise not to promise anymore
and if you come around again then
i will take the chain from off the door.

i have listened to this song more times than i care to admit in the last 36 hours. i am totally in love with it.

i have so much work to do, and i have no desire to do any of it.

the other side of this

[Now Watching]VH1 - Rock of Love: Charm School

tonight i felt lonely.

but tomorrow is monday, so everything starts again. hopefully that means i will be wayy too busy to stay lonely.



i didn't go food shopping today. i really don't want another pb&j for lunch. hopefully i wake up early enough to figure something else out...but i doubt i will.

always feel this tall

[Now Watching] Nancy Grace (she is nuts, such a riot to watch)

today was a full day. quite busy but at the same time, not at all.

i had work this morning. had to be at the store at the bright & early time of 8am. it wasn't swamped, but it wasn't dead. so i was keeping busy & the day actually flew by pretty quickly.

i was supposed to go to my cousin's first birthday party, but i had to babysit tonight since i went to the city last night. kind of bummed, but i stop by there all the time. plus she just turned one. she has no idea i wasn't there.

babysitting was good too. they watched star wars. i napped. i know it is hard work but someone has to do it.

when i came home, i finally ordered my tickets to manchester & kevin for the december shows in philly and hoboken. i was worried that they were going to sell out, thankfully that was not true.

& i also felt good about myself today all day today (even when i expected not to). that is a plus as well.



oh and last night was fucking phenomenal (more pics here)


(Moneen is a band you don't need prior knowledge to enjoy)


(kevin was entirely electric & let me see that i'm going to love the new record)


(saves was so good. i'm sad i waited this long to finally see them live)

the night ended with a perez hilton sighting & baked goods.
sometimes life isn't as bad as it normally turns out to be

while the night is still ahead

life has seemed more busy in the past week or so than it has in a long time. but i really can't figure out where all the time has gone.

i just found $6.
i am super broke, so i am super excited about that.

i just realized that i don't know where my ticket is for kevin & saves friday night. i should probably look for that, right?

dancing in the dark

i was thinking i could have bought them by now, but i am hoping that philly & hoboken don't sell out by friday morning when my direct deposit goes through.

i don't think anyone reads this thing here, but if you are - please cross your fingers for me that they aren't too close to being gone for good.

it's too late to flee

[Now Playing] Margot & The Nuclear So and So's - As Tall As Cliffs


it has been quite a day.

+ woke up on time this morning
- on time was 6:30am
- took my first teaching exam of the day
+ finished in less than 2hrs and it wasn't too bad
+ went to looney tunes and picked up some albums*
- had to be back at old westbury for test number two
- had the worst essay question ever
+ got coffee
- but they were out of boston cremes
+ came home to my blue vinyl (!!)
+ also got a check from queens for $15
+ had a (ice cream) drumstick & listened to blacktop memories

i don't know what else could go on.
it is not even 6pm, but it has been a long day



alright. here are some further explainations i would like to make...

* so went to looney tunes. i haven't been there since before it burnt down. it is much nicer now. i went with a purpose...to get the new manchester ep. i got it and it is so lovely. anything in a digipak is always better, but i can't wait to watch the ep. (it has videos from knitting factory? that was such a good night) i also picked up this weezer ep that i thought was super limited from 2002, but apparently they still have. i was looking through their vinyls b/c i was hoping that they had the new margot. i would rather get it there than order it. i have to go back though. there was so much that i wanted. but i should totally wait until i am done with school. plus i just like to collect the vinyl & really don't play it.

like homework on sundays

[Now Playing] Leona Naess - On My Mind

i have been like an absentee landlord around this place. but i do think of it often. i have just been super busy & when i get home i am not thinking about typing in this white box blogger provides. i didn't even see my mother for 2.5 days...i just heard her screaming from downstairs telling me to get up.

i have two teaching certification exams tomorrow, i don't want to take them. but i have put them off long enough.

i have gotten a little better but relapse every now & again. but as a whole i kind of feel alright about myself. which is good b/c i haven't felt that way in a long while.


...oh, that lesson plan i was bitching about? i did swimmingly & got another A.

sick of trying to be tough

i still haven't started my lesson plan.

all i want to do right now is crawl under my covers and cry.

oh homework, i hate you

i should have had my lesson plan all typed up already. i do not want to be up all night completing it.

but really, i have more desire to go get some coffee and a donut than doing anything resembling work or even studying for my teaching exams that i have on saturday.

oh well.

i fought the law

[Now Playing] a CNN report on crazy sarah palin

yeah, i am going to have to wait on the whole playstation thing...that is until i see if i get a ticket from the city of long beach for running a red light. i mean i am going to fight it, but i'm probably going to have to pay something. i just don't know when and how much.

boo to life.

what have i done

all i wanted to do tonight into tomorrow was watch my 30 rock dvds

but i am giving in and saying my dvd player broke. i'm not really sure why this happened. all i am sure of is that i think i want to get a playstartion 2 so i can get guitar hero too. i think it is a good idea. i mean i get a discount at game stop so i might as well put it to good use.

then again i am so broke, i don't know how possible that is.

cause i don't want to charge anything & be more in debt.

wont you let me let you let go

[Now Playing] Koufax (i don't know what song, i'm just letting the cd play)

looking at the calendar and counting days made me realize how pathetic of a human being i am.

i have a negative amount of money, seriously, but i am determined to go out this weekend. i have brief ideas for friday & sunday nights, but at least a meal with helen seems very likely for monday.

i am going out to lunch later with my mom & the athletic trainer from my high school year. i'm super excited. i haven't seen kristen in years. it should be a good time as long as my mom doesn't expect me to pay.

i try so hard not to care

i feel sad tonight.

i may need a little push

* watching the presidential debate. i should be doing homework. but i really don't want to. but i have to. boo.

* i ordered 30 rock last month ship to home. i was hoping to get it by today. i was hoping for tina fey in a little brown box. it wasn't here when i got home. so i called customer service earlier to check on my order. when i called i felt like i was clocked in and was talking like it was something i was taking care of for work. it was scary.

* today was a good day at student teaching. but i am so ready to be done and to be working full time. i love what i am doing but i need the money so terribly. having a negative bank balance isn't really what helps me wake up each morning.

* i just realized all the stuff i need for homework is in the car. damn me.

a meeting of minds

no katharine, no.

your life is still switched on

"Don't be a pussy. Commit."

when i was driving home today, there was some guy on the road with his directional on. i wasn't sure if it was left on by accident or it was because he was trying to change lanes. then i saw him start to drift from the lane we were in into the next one. you could then tell that he wasn't sure about if it was ok to do so, so he switched back into our lane. i think eventually he made it over to where he wanted to be. but out loud, all i could say was the above statement.

and then i kind of started to drift my thoughts to myself. i want to change myself. but i feel like at this point in my life it is hard. i am busy with school and work but other than that my life is pretty empty. and i don't have the time to actively try and fill it. i am really looking forward to graduating. not only to be done with school, but to have my life open up. i feel really overwhelmed with my life as is. i'm packed full of things to do but in a way so not motivated to do any of them. i want to be done so my life can feel real...because right now i feel like a fake version of myself.

you and onions make me cry

[Now Playing] Meiko's Daytrotter Sessions

i'm about to go to bed

and i think till the exact moment i pass out i am going to have to try & convince myself not to cry. because with the exception of a watery eyes late wednesday night, i haven't cried in a long time.

and i really want to keep it that way

humming all the notes you heard

it feels like a sunday but it isn't.

i spent my day today watching tv on the internet. i tried to watch more of the office & some 30 rock. but i failed. however i got a chance to watch sarah palin being ridiculous with katie couric. and then saw tina fey on last week's snl making fun of her yet again. it was great. tina fey is my favorite funny lady.




& i feel like i made no progress at all today.
i felt kind of lonely. but that is nothing new
daydreamed way too much for my own good



i've been listening to a lot of music today...not that is something abnormal. but today it was all about new music. i got the leona naess back catalogue which was exciting since her middle two albums aren't available to order at work. i also got inara george's record which is what i have been listening to most of the day. i heard her doing guest vocals on an instore play cd at the store. i looked it up and it sounded nice. so after listening to the whole thing, it is delightful.


Inara George - An Invitation
take a listen and i know you'll love it too


however, if you don't want to download it without getting a little bit of a listen, a song off the cd is my current 'Now Playing' song - Don't Let It Get You. so - listen, realize you like it, and then get the whole thing.

yes? yes. good.

rows of big dark clouds

sometimes when i reflect
i just think i am just getting what i deserve.

who knows...