i fought the law

[Now Playing] a CNN report on crazy sarah palin

yeah, i am going to have to wait on the whole playstation thing...that is until i see if i get a ticket from the city of long beach for running a red light. i mean i am going to fight it, but i'm probably going to have to pay something. i just don't know when and how much.

boo to life.

what have i done

all i wanted to do tonight into tomorrow was watch my 30 rock dvds

but i am giving in and saying my dvd player broke. i'm not really sure why this happened. all i am sure of is that i think i want to get a playstartion 2 so i can get guitar hero too. i think it is a good idea. i mean i get a discount at game stop so i might as well put it to good use.

then again i am so broke, i don't know how possible that is.

cause i don't want to charge anything & be more in debt.

wont you let me let you let go

[Now Playing] Koufax (i don't know what song, i'm just letting the cd play)

looking at the calendar and counting days made me realize how pathetic of a human being i am.

i have a negative amount of money, seriously, but i am determined to go out this weekend. i have brief ideas for friday & sunday nights, but at least a meal with helen seems very likely for monday.

i am going out to lunch later with my mom & the athletic trainer from my high school year. i'm super excited. i haven't seen kristen in years. it should be a good time as long as my mom doesn't expect me to pay.

i try so hard not to care

i feel sad tonight.

i may need a little push

* watching the presidential debate. i should be doing homework. but i really don't want to. but i have to. boo.

* i ordered 30 rock last month ship to home. i was hoping to get it by today. i was hoping for tina fey in a little brown box. it wasn't here when i got home. so i called customer service earlier to check on my order. when i called i felt like i was clocked in and was talking like it was something i was taking care of for work. it was scary.

* today was a good day at student teaching. but i am so ready to be done and to be working full time. i love what i am doing but i need the money so terribly. having a negative bank balance isn't really what helps me wake up each morning.

* i just realized all the stuff i need for homework is in the car. damn me.

a meeting of minds

no katharine, no.

your life is still switched on

"Don't be a pussy. Commit."

when i was driving home today, there was some guy on the road with his directional on. i wasn't sure if it was left on by accident or it was because he was trying to change lanes. then i saw him start to drift from the lane we were in into the next one. you could then tell that he wasn't sure about if it was ok to do so, so he switched back into our lane. i think eventually he made it over to where he wanted to be. but out loud, all i could say was the above statement.

and then i kind of started to drift my thoughts to myself. i want to change myself. but i feel like at this point in my life it is hard. i am busy with school and work but other than that my life is pretty empty. and i don't have the time to actively try and fill it. i am really looking forward to graduating. not only to be done with school, but to have my life open up. i feel really overwhelmed with my life as is. i'm packed full of things to do but in a way so not motivated to do any of them. i want to be done so my life can feel real...because right now i feel like a fake version of myself.

you and onions make me cry

[Now Playing] Meiko's Daytrotter Sessions

i'm about to go to bed

and i think till the exact moment i pass out i am going to have to try & convince myself not to cry. because with the exception of a watery eyes late wednesday night, i haven't cried in a long time.

and i really want to keep it that way

humming all the notes you heard

it feels like a sunday but it isn't.

i spent my day today watching tv on the internet. i tried to watch more of the office & some 30 rock. but i failed. however i got a chance to watch sarah palin being ridiculous with katie couric. and then saw tina fey on last week's snl making fun of her yet again. it was great. tina fey is my favorite funny lady.




& i feel like i made no progress at all today.
i felt kind of lonely. but that is nothing new
daydreamed way too much for my own good



i've been listening to a lot of music today...not that is something abnormal. but today it was all about new music. i got the leona naess back catalogue which was exciting since her middle two albums aren't available to order at work. i also got inara george's record which is what i have been listening to most of the day. i heard her doing guest vocals on an instore play cd at the store. i looked it up and it sounded nice. so after listening to the whole thing, it is delightful.


Inara George - An Invitation
take a listen and i know you'll love it too


however, if you don't want to download it without getting a little bit of a listen, a song off the cd is my current 'Now Playing' song - Don't Let It Get You. so - listen, realize you like it, and then get the whole thing.

yes? yes. good.

rows of big dark clouds

sometimes when i reflect
i just think i am just getting what i deserve.

who knows...