pretend i don't notice

so long february.
welcome march?

it's not forever but it's just tonight

my days have been like rollercoasters lately.
all these ups & downs of my moods.

right now, i'm on a down.


i should go to bed soon. i have work at 8am...which sucks. looking at the labels that are i previously assigned my entries, i haven't listened the inara george record in a long time. regardless of the fact that it might make me cry myself to sleep, i think i might have to give it a spin.

every sweetheart on the scene

[Now Playing: Kevin Devine - I can be with anyone]

lately my musical trips have been few & far between. i don't like that fact. but i have somethings coming up that i am super excited about.

here is what's coming up:
03.03 - bess rogers @ red lion
03.04 - manchester orchestra (early show)/anathallo (late show) @ mercury lounge
03.13 - fleetwood mac @ nassau coliseum
03.21 - chris cubeta / bryan dunn @ mercury lounge
03.26 - brian bonz @ johnny brenda's (philly)
04.17 - we're all broken @ maxwell's (nj)
04.24 - kevin devine @bowery ballroom
04.30 - manchester orchestra @bowery ballroom

the only one that i am not sure about is the bess rogers one. but all the other i either have tickets for or have pretty much concrete plans in my mind to go. the two shows in april that are both on fridays are going to be hard to swing with babysitting, but i am going to just have to do it b/c i haven't seen joe's full band outfit yet & it is kevin so it is pretty much obvious that i will be there (& any other shows that pop up around then).

i won't wait for you

[Now Playing: Two Tongues - Tremors]

oddly enough after that last post, today was an unexpectedly splendid day...minus the fact that my visit to target post-work was basically a bust.

sometimes thing don't work
& other times the pieces fit

today everything interlocked pleasantly.

i'll pretend that it's you

i know i don't have a terrible life. i know that things could be way worse. i know that i have friends that love me. i know that i am a good person.

but i hate how a skyline can make hate everything.

the mighty, mighty meadow

(i am home now, this was written while i was babysitting. enjoy?)

so yesterday i didn't have too much to do during the day. actually i had nothing to do during the day. i sat around. in the evening, there was more on my plate. i went to dinner with sharkey, michelle & lauren. we had a fun time roaming the island. apparently thursday nights are going to be our go out night. i think i can handle that. maybe.

today i didn't have too much to do again either. i went to best buy for the second day in a row. thursday night i went to pass time before dinner. i picked up the new thursday record and played some guitar hero to an audience of 4 year olds. today i went and picked up the first bayside album and the new records by two tongues & m. ward. i don't know why, but i have fallen back into the whole buying records thing. i think this is 7 thus far in the month of february. it is good for my collection, but bad for my wallet. and i also saw ms. laura silver. we went to the sands point preserve and walked around. it was a cold day but once we were in the woods, it wasn't too bad. we really need to find a nice day to go. last time it was raining. this time it was freezing. one day we will get this whole hanging outside thing right.

the rest of this weekend is pretty boring & lame. tonight is babysitting. tomorrow is work all day & then babysitting at night. sunday is more work early in the morning. my weekends aren't too exciting that this point in time. maybe one day soon they will start to get exciting again...i hope.

~~~~

alright.
so it is late.
i am tired.
work is in about 8 hours.

adios.

i tried to do handstands for you

i keep starting entries and then leaving them here over night with no urge to finish them during the day.

i need to start finishing these things, or at least find something exciting to say.

not a case of man vs machine

(i have written like four entries to put here but haven't posted any of them. not for any real reason, but more because i get lazy halfway through)

life has been interesting as of late. i have been in & out of moods. some moments i want to curl up & die. then other moments, i am really content. i don't know if this is me being some sort of bipolar or something.

but right now i am kind of happy.
so guess i'm going to roll with that.

always a big mess leftover

everyday i hate you a little more
everyday i know that i don't at all

if we weren't such good friends
i think that i'd hate you.
if we weren't such good friends
i'd wish you were dead.

bahhumbug.

familiar hand on my shoulder

left my house at 6:30pm
back home a little before 3am

it was a queens college kind of night
dinner with one group.
then drinks with another.

i don't really drink but if i did, i would be fucked up right now.
never before has a street corner made me want to drink till i forgot.


oh. and i changed my now playing song. it is perfect for right now.
"You never get used to it. You just have to live with it "

run and don't look back

i have been posting a bunch of videos lately.

you really can't see anything in this one, but all you need to know is that it makes me want to die (which is a good thing).



i owe jackie tons for getting this on tape. after this song, tina turned to me and asked me something like "is he always that intense?" and during certain songs, the answer is basically "yeah." but i could go on & on, so just know that from 2:40 gives me goosebumps every time. i haven't seen kevin in a long time. i miss this & i miss him. i am going to make it my business to go to more than one stop on the next tour.

i need some sort of recipe

i haven't been here in a long while. which i guess is a good thing? i have been working a whole bunch, hanging out with good people, playing a lot of Yoshi Island DS, and other things i guess. apparently the key to keeping me sane is keeping me somewhat busy.

There exists a melody
That just might change your mind
If only I knew the key
To sing to make you mine

i have work soon. but i am going to run out to best buy first & pick up a couple records that are out today. it is always a fun thing to spend money that i really don't have.

this was a choice

i have had this urge to read lately. i don't know why. i do know i don't like to read, so it is a very confusing thing.

i wasn't sure how i would feel about this, but i like it...i mean, it's matt pryor.


my mood is kind of easily swayed. i should probably stop listen to music that can easily fuck with my emotions

i have been thinking a lot about my future lately. to quote sharkey, i am comfortable at the bookstore. i have been putting things off career wise lately b/c i was able to tell myself that it is hard to get an in someplace. but monday morning i was woken up by my old co-op teacher and was told that once i am available, let her know & i will have an subbing job at the school. now i don't have any lie to tell myself on why i should stay at the bookstore. i has been nice the last couple weeks. it is nice to have no real adult like activities. i was in college for 7.5 years. i deserve a break. but i know i should start this whole "being a grown up" lifestyle & have no way to convince my parents otherwise. i still have time to put it all off. however i know i can't carry on this way for ever.

oh, and i was looking at getting an iPod touch. which i can't use on my computer b/c i can't update to iTunes 8. also i can't b/c i don't have a spare 400 dollars to spend on such a contraption. but that isn't really the point. the point is that i want a cool new toy.

speaking of toys, i haven't been able to find my ds for weeks.

speaking of being stupid, i have a feeling i am not showing up to the bonz show tomorrow night because of my apathetic trends lately.

speaking of retardation, jamie being kicked off top chef tonight? fucking bullshit. leah should have been gone a long time ago & i can't believe she is still there.